Memories

It seems to me that most relationships seem pointless. Tell me, at the end of it all, what do you get? All the bitching, all the agony, all the pain, all the hurt, all the lethargy, all the drama, all the emotions. No more, no more, I tell you.

I know you still think about it. I find it amusing though. So much for forgetting me huh. I know you never will. Or rather, I will always have that spot somewhere, deep inside, be it hate or love. I know you don't know what to feel about me. That's just too bad though. I will always be your first love. Nothing will change that. I will always be that bitch that gave you the extremities of life, its highest highs and its lowest lows. Nothing will change that. And that, I can see. I know you're pensive, what with going through SISPEC and all. Trust me boy, you will change. Maybe you might not. But I do hope you will mature. Somehow. One day, just one day. I know we will meet again. How and when I do not know.

I am pretty happy pseudo-single and alone. Then again, the alone sometimes feels so alone. I used to have someone by my side to do everything I did. He was the best friend. But my life is so hectic now. And in those moments, I feel certain surges of emptiness. And I don't know why.

Over the weekend perhaps, I might just head for a drink at Backstage at Tanjong PAgar. A recent trip there provoked some memories. When the hurt and the anger fades, that is all that is left.

And right now, they feel like nothing more than empty shells,
a life that plays like a reel in the movies,
vacated and empty,
its owners long gone,
abandoned with nostalgia.